


Black Widow Bakery

by LolitaArmin129



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Adorable Armin Arlert, Cannibal!Armin, Dark Comedy, F/F, F/M, French-Speaking Armin, He's also a siren in here, Horror Comedy, Like a LOT of it!, Lots and LOTS of sweets!, Multi, Sexual Content, Shameless Smut, Smut, Sweet Lolita!Armin, Ymir is basically like Plankton in here, dark themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-28 06:50:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8435725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LolitaArmin129/pseuds/LolitaArmin129
Summary: Armin is an adorable 19 year old Lolita boy who runs a bakery in modern day Germany. His sweets are all the rage with the ladies, but what's the secret behind his baking expertise? Please read to find out!





	1. Chapter 1

 

"Good evening ladies! How may I help you?" A young man with blonde hair asked politely. The two women just blushed and looked over his appearance before making eye contact with his face again." Um yes, we had heard some pretty good things about this tea shop of yours and well..we would like to try some of your sweets if that's okay?" She said blushing shyly. This woman had dark long violet blue hair, pale lavender pupiless eyes, and milky white skin while the woman next to her had short pink bubblegum hair, light green eyes slightly healthier looking skin.(see if you can guess who these two are!)

"Why Of course!" The blonde replied walking them over to a table,"follow me" he said. The two women looked over the young man again and blushed. The boy was dressed in some sort of cute male lolita attire. He wore white thigh high stockings with baby blue stripes, puffy white booty shorts that looked like bloomers with pale blue lace on them, and a white button up blouse with baby blue lace at the bottom . He wore a white long sleeved lolita blouse with blue lace at the end of his sleeves and a baby blue bow tie. His bobbed cut hair was neatly combed. From what they could see, this place had a nice little homey touch to it, and just like it's owner, it had a heavy lolita-esque appearance to it. There were a few male customers here, but other than that the majority of the place was female.

Finding a nice window seat, the boy sat them down and gave them both some menus to look at. "Take your time okay?" He said smiling cutely at the two girls. "Thanks a lot" the pinkette smiled peering at their server's name tag "Armin". Armin smiled sweetly and then disappeared into the kitchen. "He's kind of cute!" The pink woman said " _and_ he has a cute ass!" The dark haired woman sitting across from her only looked at her with a shocked expression. "S-sakura Chan!" She squeaked."what about Sasuke?"

Sakura just snorted " _fuck_ him" she said. "Besides Hinata he looks like he could be your type, unlike _other_ blondes we know about.." A moment later, Armin returned with a tray containing fancy expensive looking teacups with an equally expensive looking teapot. "did you guys decide on what you want yet? " he asked as he poured the two some tea."everything looks so good in here it's kind of hard to pick.." Sakura replied."what would you recommend? " she asked.

"Hmm well I _did_ make a fresh batch of strawberry shortcake today..And I'm really fond of the apple pies and strudel here too! Actually... there the reason why I can't squeeze into any skinny jeans anymore.." He said sighing while looking down in mild shame at his booty. _"It's going to take me forever to lose the weight back there.."_ He thought to himself _._ His best friend Eren had tried to warn him to lay off the sweets but he just wouldn't stop. It got bad to the point where Eren keeps calling him "Sweetie Minaj". The fact that he had a little pink cupcake tattoo with white frosting on his left bum cheek really didn't help either. It looked like a cutie mark!

"Apple pie sounds nice" Hinata said. Sakura nodded in agreement, "okay, we'll try that then" she said giving the menus back to Armin. "Okay, be right back" He said taking the menus and walking away with the tray. One minute later, he came back with two plates of tasty looking apple pie."please enjoy " he said. "Thanks!" Sakura said tasting the pie. She sat perfectly still and her eyes sparkled for a moment before eating the entire thing whole.

'Sakura! " Hinata said in surprise as she watched Sakura devour the entire confection surprising Armin then looked at Armin with glossy eyes and blushing cheeks making him back up a bit. " oh my god..your pie is delicious! Can you be my boyfriend and cook for me!?" Sakura said in a dreamy like voice. _"_ w-what's wrong with Sakura? " Hinata asked looking at Armin. "Don't worry, she's only like that because of the pie" he said smiling sheepishly."you see,I'm a pretty talented baker... "

Hinata then grabbed her fork and took a sample of her pie. Armin almost giggled at the reaction that he had got out of her next. it almost looked like Hinata was having a silent mini orgasim from the look on her face."I..um..this is really delicious " Hinata said blushing. "May I please have a doggie bag so I can take another piece home and let my b-boyfriend try some?" She had asked.

"Sure!" Armin beamed and fetched a doggie bag loaded with extra pies and sweets for the two girls."I know where I'm coming to next time on my lunch break" Sakura said wiping her mouth."this pie is the shit! Way better than that other pastry shop down the street" Armin couldn't help but feel a strong sense of pride at this compliment."Thank you" he said. _"That's because the one down the street is always trying to copy off of my shit"_ he thought to other pastry shop a couple buildings over called "Fantasy Pastries" had opened up a year ago and was run by a hot lesbian couple named Christa and Ymir. There stuff was good too but not as good as Armin's.

"I have to know, what do you _put_ in here to make it so good?" Sakura asked. Hinata was also curious to know this as well. Armin then giggled,put his hands together in a heart shaped hand sign and batted his eyelashes at the two saying "I Make them with love". "Well you must love to them _a lot_ for them to taste this good!" Sakura said getting up and pinching his cheek. "How much do we owe you?" She asked. "$10.50" Armin two girls paid Armin and then took their leave."It was nice to meet you " Hinata mumbled not quite over her sugar high. "Thank you for the sweets" "It's no problem" he said taking the money and giving them their change.

After that, the two girls left, leaving Armin to tend to the rest of his customers. Before he knew it, it was already 9:00 PM and close to closing time. He was busy wiping off and polishing the tables when he had heard the little bell that jingled in the doorway whenever a customer came in."Hey Sweetie Minaj!" He heard a familiar voice say."Oh Shut up Eren!" Armin replied. Eren was wearing a black hoodie with fluffy black wolf ears and a tail attached to it with dark green skinny jeans and black chuck had a silver tongue piercing and a eyebrow piercing on his left eyebrow. Armin and Eren had known each other since they were three.

The tan boy just snickered at his friend's reaction. "Oh come on, you know it's true! Everybody knows you got a don-" he was then cut off by Armin squirting a can of chocolate vanilla icing on his face."say another word about my ass and I'm squirting it up your nose next" he warned. "Mmmm!" Eren reached out his tongue to lick the icing off of his face." Dude this is great! Is this icing homemade?" Armin nodded while giving him some napkins to wipe the rest of his face off."yup! It took me all day yesterday to get it just right"

"Mind if I help you clean up?" He asked already grabbing a broom. Armin put down his washrag and sat on top of one of the tables making himself comfortable. "Go ahead, I already knocked out the rest of the cleaning in here" he yawned. "So hey did you hear about that missing girl that disappeared last week? It's all over FaceBook" Eren said. "Really?" Armin replied looking up at Eren. "Yeah see?" He said holding up his iPhone6. It showed an article of a girl with purple ankle length hair with pink streaks and bright blue eyes flashed across the screen. The headline of the Article read: _ **STOCKING ANARCHY AGE 18 GOES MISSING! LAST SEEN WEARING GOTHic LOLITA CLOTHING! IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION ABOUT HER WHEREABOUTS PLEASE CONTACT THE AUTHORITIES!"**_

"Oh my gosh are you serious?" Armin asked gazing at the Article. "Yeah. She had disappeared the other day and nobody has been able to find her" Eren replied putting the phone back in his pocket."well, I better head back out before Mom starts worrying where I'm at " he said walking towards the door."see ya Armin!" Eren said flashing him a smile before leat."see you pancake ass!" Armin replied waving him goodbye.

Once he closed up shop, he went upstairs to the second floor where he resided after hours. His shop consisted of two (technically three) floors. The first floor was his Bakery/tea shop and the second floor was where his little apartment was situated at. Just like the bakery, it was heavily lolita themed with Plush lavish Victorian era furniture in it. It consisted of a bedroom,bathroom and a small little kitchen in it. The third floor however, was actually a basement underneath the restaurant. This was where he would come up with new recipes for his sweets.

Once he showered and changed into some lolita Pjs he grabbed his cooking apron and went downstairs into the basement with an odd smile on his face now. Once he was there,he giggled evilly at the sight before him. It was none other than Stocking herself fully drugged out and relaxing in a chair in a happy drunken daze from Armin's sweets. She was nude and tied up in silky lacy ribbons that was covering her extreme lady bits from view.

"You're going to be a very good girl for me aren't you stocking?" He purred stroking her purple and pink hair lovingly with an evil glint in his eye."you have no idea how tasty of a treat you're going to be for me"he said licking his lips mischievously.


	2. Enter Fantasy Pastry!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An interesting customer enters Armin's shop.

"Grr! How does that cupcake ass over there do it!?" A brown haired woman said slamming her fist down on the counter. She had a dark tan with freckles, wore her short hair in a low stubby ponytail, and she had a slight boyish appearance. She wore tight black skinny jeans, a burgundy tank top, burgundy sandals and gold hoop earrings. "How the hell does that girly boy get _so many_ customers! Does he _sleep_ with them or something!?"

"But look Ymir!" A cute blonde girl in a blue sundress and sandalls chirped. "We have a pretty good amount of customers here too!" She replied trying to comfort her girlfriend. Ymir just pouted and puffed out her freckled cheeks. "Pfft! Seven to ten people a day isn't good enough Christa! That Black Widow Bakery be more packed than a strip club! just what's so damn  _special_ About that guy's cakes anyway?"

"Well we could just go _ask_ Armin what he does with his sweets?" Christa suggested. "Maybe then we would have more customers"Ymir blinked for a moment and then suddenly grabbed Christa in a bear hug."Christa baby you just gave me an idea!" The tan tomboy said. "R-really? I did?" Christa asked confused. "Yes!" Ymir nodded. "We could go over there and sabotage his secret baking recipe! That way _we'll_ be the best Bakery here and people will stop going over there! Oohhh Christa you're such a good little wifey! Muahahah!" _"Oh boy.."_ Christa thought to herself.

XxxMeanwhile back at Armin's bakeryxxx

Armin came downstairs from his apartment ready to open up shop. He wore pink ruffled silky booty shorts that showed off his cutie mark with white lace around the bottom, pink and white candy cane stockings and a white lolita blouse with a pink silky button up vest over it along with a giant pink and white bowtie. His hair was held back and styled in a low ponytail with a shiny silky pink ribbon.

Turning on the lights in the bakery, he skipped downstairs to fetch his latest creation. It was dimly lit in some areas of his punk lolita styled basement but if you were to look very closely, you could see small splatters of blood on the pink and black checkered floor. A big blue bloody hair bow could be seen in his loveseat where Stocking was seen sitting at the night before. A huge black witchy looking oven along with a shiny polished black cauldron with left over cake batter in it could be seen in the corner.

Putting on some pink fluffy oven mitts, he went over to the oven and took out a fresh batch of cupcakes. They were purple with dark purple and pink frosting with black sprinkles. The wrappers he used for them was decorated with black and purple stripes with pink glitter. Armin sniffed the Sweet aroma coming from the cupcakes and smiled in success.

 _"These cup cakes are perfect!"_ He thought to himself. Taking the cupcakes, he took them upstairs to the bakery and placed them on his counter. Hearing the door open he looked over and saw a hot blonde girl with big wavy pointed tipped ankle length hair and teal eyes come in. She wore red lipstick, a red mini dress, red pumps and a pearl necklace with matching earrings. She was clutching a bottle of vodka and walking with a slight wobble in her step.

"Hey hot stuff, got anything good to eat here?"She asked Armin. " actually ma'am, you're in luck! I just got done baking these" he said gesturing to the fresh cupcakes on the counter."the blonde chick looked at the cupcakes and smirked."Hey..I don't know why, but these kind of remind me of my sister " she said picking one up and examining it. "Really?" Armin said cocking an eyebrow. "How so?"

"She would always wear those same dark looking colors! Even the _frosting_ looks like her hair color!" She exclaimed."She had disappeared the other night and nobody has any fucking clue where she went to.." Armin's eyes now shone with interest.

"You mean that Stocking chick all over Facebook?" he asked. "Yeah that's her, I'm surprised I didn't walk in and find her pigging out in here! The bitch is a sweetaholic!"

Armin remembered when Stocking first came in here the other day, she was literally having a sugar high! "I'm sure you'll find her soon" he said giving her a look of reassurance. "Ugh she better, the chick is driving me crazy looking for her ass! It's ruining my man hunting!" She groaned. This just made Armin laugh."what's your name? " Armin asked. "It's panty sweet cheeks"

"Well here panty, maybe a snack will help you relax" he suggested walking her over to a cozy table.

"Ugh Sweetie I'm going to need more than a snack" Panty said taking a bite out of her cupcake. "I'm going to need another bottle of vodka with a rock hard-" she stopped talking however, when she started to feel a super pleasant sensation running through her body."ohh _fuck!_ " Armin heard panty whisper to herself. "Is something wrong miss panty?" Armin asked with an amused smirk."damn son what did you _put_ in here?" Panty asked. "This is like sex with frosting!" She replied feeling a nice warm sensation between her legs now.

" hey.. You got more of those right?" Panty asked looking at Armin with lust filled eyes." Sure do" He said. "Hold on" the now aroused Panty kept her eyes locked on Armin's "Cutie Mark" as he walked away to fetch the pastries. _"God damn son.."_ Panty thought to herself. "Hey kid, anybody tell you you got a nice ass?" Armin's face glowed a hot red hearing this. "Maybe.." He replied blushing.

Walking back over to her with another cupcake, he watched her gulp down the second one in amusement. It was at that moment when Armin had an idea. _"if her sister turned out to be a good cupcake just imagine how tasty off a treat she must be.."_ He thought to himself. Just the mere _thought_ of it had him all giddy and hot. "Miss Panty?.." Armin piped up.

"Yeah sweet cheeks what is it?" She stopped breathing when Armin looked at her with a very sexy look on his face and bent over whispering in her ear saying " would you like to taste some more of my pastries?" He asked nibbling her ear and rubbing a hand up and down her thigh in a slow seductive manner. Panty's eyes widened for a moment but soon broke out into a big cheesy grin when she got the message.

"Hell yeah sweet cheeks" and with that he grabbed her and lead her in back of the bakery where the kitchen was at with an evil smirk along with a condom and a little pocket knife in his pocket.


	3. I Make Them with Love! <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Just to warn you, there's going to be some drugs,sex, N murder within this chapter so just beware of that. Now, ON WITH THE STORY!

"Oh my God yes! Harder blondie! harder!" Panty moaned. Armin was currently sitting on the kitchen table with Panty sprawled out across his lap on all fours. Her dress was pushed up past her waist and her panties were dangling off of her right thigh, exposing her bare bottom for the world go see. The blonde boy smirked in pleasure as he spanked Panty with a shiny metal cake spatula.

"you mean like this?" He purred spanking her a second time."what a dirty little lady you are Panty" he said beating her ass with the spatula."I bet you came in here looking for more than sweets didn't you? You probably came in here wanting me to fuck the shit out of you with this spatula didn't you? " the male lolita teased egging her on.

Now you're probably wondering.. _why_ on Earth is Armin doing kinky stuff to Panty in his kitchen? Simple answer my fellow readers, this was how the little Baker treated _all_ of his victims before turning them into cake. Much like a siren, he would lure women(and on extremely rare occasion men) in his shop and seduce them right before quickly killing them. The more aroused the victim was before death, the tastier his pastries would be. So to put it simply... _lust_ was the secret ingredient behind his success. So in an odd morbidly disturbing kind of way, it wasn't a total lie when he says that he makes them with love.

Panty panted and groaned as she creamed on Armin's bare thigh. Putting down his spatula, he dipped a finger in the little white puddle and teasingly licked it off in front of Panty, making very lewd and soft moaning noises. _"she tastes so damn good"_ Armin thought to himself. She would make an excellent pastry indeed. "Get up for me love" The male lolita ordered.

Panty did as she was told and stood up in front of Armin still in a drunken haze. Reaching for the hem of her dress, he pulled it up pulling the red garment off over her head before tossing it aside, leaving her in only her red pumps and jewelry. Grabbing both of her tits, he leaned over and started to suck on them lovingly making her moan in delight."aah! Fuck Blondie you really know what you're doing!" Panty moaned.

Armin looked up at her and winked in response with her nipple still in his mouth. Panty snaked her hands up Armin's hair and tugged on it making it fall out of it's ponytail and back in it's regular style as he continued to suckle on her mounds. Taking her tit out of his mouth, he got up and started licking the skin between her breasts, making them glisten with saliva.

He licked her down making her tremble before going down further to her belly botton, licking over it until he was down on his knees and kneeling in front of her waxed lips,Armin blew on her sensitive area making her shudder."you like that?" Armin asked the angel huskily. Panty took a shaky breath before eagerly nodding."oh really? What else would you like miss panty?" He asked licking his lips."I bet you'd want me to fuck you right here in this kitchen don't you? Well rest assured Miss Panty, I'll make sure to give you a very good treat" he said slyly.

Placing his hands on her hips, he quietly leant forward and placed a chaste kiss on her labia making her moan. He then pecked her there again and again until his kisses started to get more passionate and lewd. Sticking out his pierced tongue, he parted Panty's lips before sticking it in completely. Panty was in heaven! She threw her head back with her eyes shut as Armin flicked his tongue back and forth like a snake against her hot pink.

Panty jolted in surprised when she felt an intense vibrating sensation against her clitoris. _"IS THAT HIS PIERCING DOING THAT!?"_ she thought looking down at the man. Well then again, her underwear could turn into a gun so she couldn't say shit. Armin smirked in triumph when Panty noticed this. _"I knew this tongue ring would come in handy"_ Armin thought to himself feeling his tongue vibrate against Panty some more.

As he continued to eat Panty, he pulled his booty shorts down letting his erection pop out. Keeping his mouth and vibrating tongue ring latched onto the woman, he started to stroke himself moaning in bliss. Feeling that him and Panty was about to come any minute now, he took Panty out of his mouth and gestured with his finger to get down on the floor with him.

Once she was down on her knees with him on the floor, he gently grabbed her chin and lowered her head to his rock hard friend with his legs spread wide open. "Taste you a little bit of my sugar Miss Panty" Armin cooed rubbing the tip of his head against her plump lips "I know you're still a bit hungry for more.." Panty moaned as she parted her lips for the man, letting his cock sink into her mouth.

Armin groaned in pleasure and started speaking French to Panty in a very sultry voice.* _"mmmph!..oui mon joli ange chienne, get it belle et humide"_ Armin moaned feeling Panty suck him off _"Sucer cette merde que je puisse vas te faire encule et faire un gâteau délicieux sur le cul sexy"_ Panty didn't know _what_ Armin just said but it sure as hell sounded sexy.

Bringing Panty up on her knees, he turned her around so her back was now against him. Bending her over just a bit, he lined his cock up with her pussy and soon started taking her from the back. Panty damn near went blind from the amount of pleasure she was experiencing. The slapping of thighs against thighs could be heard as Armin fucked her into oblivion.

Armin moaned loudly in Panty's ear as he rested his head against her shoulder. Reaching in front of her he used one hand to grab onto her left breast, while the other one traveled to her nether regions as he trusted in and out of her."Harder! _Harder!_ _ **Harder!**_ " Panty screamed as he drove her to orgasim all over the tiled floor. Armin grabbed her chin and turned her head, having her make out with him as he creamed long and hard in her vagina.

He shuddered and moaned into the hot kiss as he rode out his orgasim banging into her some more. Panty screamed in pure inhuman bliss as she felt the rest of Armin's hot filling squirt inside of her. Finally soft and empty, he pulled out of her and panted silently reaching for his little blade. "Jesus Christ sweet cheeks!" Panty said taking a long swig of a cigarette "you know how to please a"- _SLASH!_

Panty didn't get a chance to finish her sentence as she felt the cool metal of Armin's knife slash her throat from behind her. Blood squirted out of the fatal wound and onto the kitchen floor as Panty blacked out and died instantly. "Thank you for coming to Black Widow Bakery Panty.." Armin giggled licking sweet blood off of his knife like a popsicle "it was a real _pleasure_ serving you..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! From here on out, I'm going to translate whatever dialogue Armin has in French throughout the story
> 
> -warning! Disturbing translation-
> 
> Translation: *mmm that's right sexy, suck this sugary d*ck so I can f*ck you and turn you into pie..


	4. Sabotage Stew!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little sabotage mission is in order for Ymir and Christa!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please enjoy the chapter!

"Ymir are you sure this is necessary?" Christa asked looking at her and her lover's attire. Her and Ymir were both dressed in black cat burglar suits and sneaking in back of Armin's Bakery."of course this is necessary! " Ymir replied grinning. "We're going to break in and Sabotage Strawberry Shortcake's food, and once people start to get food poisoning from here, they'll be coming to us in no time"

Once they snuck in through the back door, the two girls found themselves in the kitchen where all of his baking utensils and cakes were on display. As far as they could see nobody was there, and it looked like it had just been cleaned."It's so cute in here!" Christa exclaimed looking around in awe."even some of his mixing spoons and spatulas have bows on them!" Ymir cringed "yeah, too cute" she said looking at the girly decor of the kitchen and the bakery. "How a guy can even _live_ in this frilly dump is beyond me!"

Spotting the Stocking cupcakes that were on display in front, she pulled an odd looking powder that resembled sugar from her pocket and sprinkled it on them and a few of the chocolate cream filled donuts nearby too. Truthfully, Ymir wasn't sure what this powder would do, but hopefully it'll do it's job and run Armin's customers out of there.

"hee hee hee alright Christa that should do it!" The tan girl said. "I can't wait to see the look on Strawberry Shortcake's face when he sees his customers puking there guts out!" She froze however, when she felt something rubbing up against her leg purring."what the-?" Looking down,her eyes widened at the sight of a humungous super fat,super fluffy, angry looking white cat with a ribbon tied around it's neck.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?" Ymir screeched looking at the deranged looking mass of fur."what a cute Kitty! " Christa cooed picking up and hugging the grumpy looking cat. The cat purred in content looking at Christa."THE HECK IT IS LET'S GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!" Ymir said grabbing Christa's hand and bolting out of the back door.

A few minutes later, Armin reappeared walking back upstairs to the kitchen wearing his frilly white apron and chef hat on with his headphones on top of his head. Spotting his cat, he turned down his music and walked over to the fluffy beast and picked it up. "Goodmorning Mr Whiskers! Did you have a good night's sleep?" Armin cooed. Mr Whiskers yawned in response and then snuggled his little pink nose on Armin's cheek. "Meow!" The cat replied.

Armin giggled and set MrWhiskers back down on the floor. "Well, I better open up shop" he said flipping the closed sign on the door to open. Within minutes the whole place was invaded with hungry women. "Goodmorning Sweetie Minaj!" He heard Eren say coming into the shop. "Morning pancake ass!" Armin yawned writing down orders at the counter next to the cash register.

Eren was wearing a fluffy grey cat hoodie today with a black T-shirt underneath and black skinny jeans. His feet was adorned with designer grey and black checkered Chuck Taylor's. "Damn is it packed in here!" He said looking at all the women. You'd think there was a Victoria's Secret sale in here! "Need any help buddy!?" He called over to the blonde.

"Yes please!" Armin called back over to Eren."Help me take these orders!" Eren quickly slipped on his roller blades, put on a spare apron, and started going around taking orders and bringing out sweets to the ladies. "Thank you Eren!" Armin said catering to a table of cute black girls. Eren gave him a little thumbs up and continued taking orders."these are _so good!_ "A black girl with brown hair and hazel eyes said. ," yeah white boy over here knows how to cook!" Another black girl with burgundy hair and dark eyes said." My man at home can't cook for _shit!_ "

"Thank you ladies" he said winking at the two women. "Aww how cute is he?" The blonde haired cooed looking at Armin."And he called us ladies!" The burgundy woman said with hearts in her eyes." How many guys call there girls ladies anymore? "'Armin blushed at the two women's compliments at walked over to Eren who was holding down the cash register and watching Armin." Hey Armin, how come you always get girls and all I got is Mikasa?" Eren asked in jealousy.

As if on cue a little black cat with dark grey eyes and a bored expression appeared from behind Eren's Bored looking cat had extra long fur on her head with bangs in the front, making it look like she was wearing a human girl hairstyle. "Umm because of my polite charm, brains and cuteness?" Armin smiled picking Mikasa up and petting the extra long fur on her head making her purr.

"Oh fuck you Armin" Eren pouted childishly."I could be cute too if I wanted too! See?" Looking at a random woman, tried to give her a cute puppy dog pout, but it came out looking more like an angry puppy instead. "Aww you're so cute! look just like my pet chihuahua!" The woman said ruffling up Eren's hair and walking away.

"See that! I'm cute!" He smirked triumphantly. Armin laughed at this while still holding Mikasa. "IT'S A MIRACLE!" The two boys heard a girl screech happily from across the shop. "Huh!?" They both said turning to the source of the outburst. A pretty red headed young woman with humongous jiggly bouncing breasts came rushing over to the two guys.

"Who made this cupcake!?" She demanded holdings up one of Armin's Stocking cupcakes. "This little gnome over here!" Eren said pointing to Armin. The red head turned to Armin with sparkles in her eyes and hugged him, suffocating him with her breasts in the process."OH MY GOD THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!" She squealed happily. Tears of happiness poured down her cheeks.

Now normally,Armin secretly wouldn't mind having boobs in his face but this woman was _really_ making it hard for him to breathe! Eren pried his half dead friend from the massive cleavage and raised an eyebrow in confusion. "I don't get it, what did he do?" The Brunette asked." he made a miracle cupcake that's what he did!" The woman replied. "This morning I looked like this!" She continued holding up a selfie of her. She looked exactly the same except that she was flat as a board in the picture.

"And now, thanks to this little cutie's cupcake, I look like _THIS!_ " She squealed grabbing her new pair of double d's. Every woman in the shop now paid attention to what the woman was saying in awe. The next thing Eren and Armin knew, a stampede of women were making a mad dash towards the Stocking cupcakes. It was a scene out of The Hunger Games. All of the deranged desperate women were clawing and battling each other for the tray of cupcakes.

Armin hid behind the counter in fear while Eren was on the counter pointing Armin's bottle of icing at the crazed customers."Back you hot savages! Back i say!" He threatened with Mikasa and Mr Whiskers hissing and scowling at the women. Ymir and Christa who had been watching across the street and peeking through the windows with binoculars looked in dumbfounded at all the commotion.

"What the actual _fuck_ !?" Ymir said."Christa hand me that bottle of powder again!" Christa nodded and handed over the powder. Ymir's jaw dropped when she read the label. It read _**"Female Growth Hormone"**_ ,"SO EVERYONE IN THERE IS GOING TO WALK OUT WITH HIGH SCHOOL OF THE DEAD BOOBIES!?" She screeched.

Christa sweatdropped as Ymir continued to as this was happening, a cute brown haired woman wearing a high ponytail watched the madness going on from inside another restaurant in confusion as she stirred her pot of beef stew while crunching on a potato. "I wonder what's going on over in Armin's place?"she thought out loud to herself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Ymir and Christa! I almost feel sorry for them...almost XD


End file.
